How High Will You Go?

I had the pleasure attending a conference in Cambridge where Jeff Taylor was the opening banquet's keynote speaker. He's a pretty good speaker and gave me some idea I could incorprate into some of my speeches. But most shocking was how he used some of the same phrases and techniques I used to my advantage four years ago.Very eye opening. Anyway, his talk set the tone for the Synergy 06 event, where edcators from across the country come together to work on action plans to address the need to create 21st Century Learners. It's one of those pedagogical buzzwords being thrown lately to slyly imply that shT is ugly. The state of our education system is in disarray and if something is not done to proactively address the future now, things will get even uglier.

But more on the conference later. Mr. Taylor was once known as the Chief Monster. He founded monster.com back in the day and steered it towards the phenomenal success that its had up to now. So basically, he's a super entrepreneur and is a highly in-demand speaker and business strategist. But his latest endeavor is intriguing. Eons.com will focus its attention on the baby boomer market and lavish and abundance of resources on a market segment that Taylor and his cronies think has not been truly tapped. We got a sneak preview of the eons.com site and its features/content. The site goes lives Monday, July 31st at 4pm. Suffice it to say that the site didn't exactly amaze me, but the concept stuck in my mind.

All those baby boomers are nearing retirement age and moving on to tackle those regrets they still have. So one feature is a listing of the top ten things you want to do before you die. A haunting premise, but one full of hope and promise. As I heard the idea for the first time, it did make sense. In its rawest form, I see it as a service tailored to help people live their lives to the fullest. Can't argue with that. nahmean.

with night sticks i write quick hoping that i might hit somebody in the heart

Like an arrow with her eyes on a sparrow
Yo i feel my peoples pain all in my bone marrow

just making observations...

a sister cannot go to their slain brother's memorial without losing her life

the justice department's civil rights division is quietly being staffed with lawyers who lean wit it (to the right, that is). and yes being neutral is ideal, let's really keep it real here people.

boston neighborhoods have the most youth and teens on them than there have been in decades.

the preachers are being look towards as the ones with the answers too much

not enough youth input is being captured and factored into the solution equation

there are 12-year-olds with guns

the four peace video is still being filmed. they will be filming at the Suffolk County House of Corrections. appraently, the media is very interested in the story. I'm interested in the angle. If only DS got the call to pen the piece. At least I'd feel content knowing it'd be covered right. But we shall see.

teen prostitution is the new elephant in the room. it is slowly becoming an epidemic.

if you see a teenager with MEMPHIS on his shirt, take a picture and send it to me. more details to follow. it won't be good news though.

the issue surrounding the memorials of homicide victims is a microcosm of the hood as a whole. let's agree to disagree on this one if you ain't with that view.

foreclosure are up in Massachusetts and the more I think about it, the more I'm leaning to buying a crib in another state. A nice big one with much more bang for my buck that forcing myself to settle on something here that would not truly be what I wanted.

I heard Cambridge Mayor Ken Reeves speak. He and big bro Horace convened a Leaders of Color event at City Hall that has the potential to flip shT. Definitely makes for some interesting brainstorming. But aside from issue tackling, there appears an obvious need for some much needed relationship building to occur first. Latinos are mad at Blacks about immigration. Blacks arfe mad at Latinos because they not speaking up enough about youth & violence. Cape Verdeans and others feel let out because of language barriers for some. Asians don't get invited to people of color events. Yeah, the Team Unity house needs to get itself in order and make a home first.

the violence is coming full circle. last week I was speaking to a friend about the peace movement and about stuff in general. today, i hear that one of the guys that got killed this past weekend was her cousin. and she is very involved in the peace movement. this shT is very, very maddening.

i got "assigned" a mentee tonight. his teacher flunked him. then he got kicked out of summer school. so he'll be repeating the 7th grade next year. i'm debating my strategy. hard-a$$ or mellow. apparently, moms is hardcore but he still does his wild out thing. hmmmm

i designed new business cards for myself. may have to revamp the whole brand identity now.

i once famously said that I'd like for the midget to know algebra by the second grade

now conflict resolution is tops on my list

even your emotions had an echo

it's been a long time...i shouldn't have left you

but son was depressed, yo.

but i'm gradually getting over the funk and moving on with life

i've come to realize, well maybe not just realize, but truly accept, admit, and acknowledge that as much as we try to do things to get our ducks in a row and make sure everything is on point, there's a percentage of fate that is simply out of your hands.

over the past month and a half, i've had so many highs and lows it has truly been on some rollercoaster shT. aside from family drama, to work headaches, to having my heart broken, to petty life nuisances across the country affecting other family and friends, to the daily emotional effects of feeling seemingly helpless and useless amid a sea of ingrained nig%anomics, it ain't that bad. but it damn sure could be better.

we got ceilings dropping on a happy couple, a$holes in the middle east still fighting, corrupt cops getting bagged, and gun play in the hood damn ner every fuqing day.

i had forced myself to not blog for a while until i could fully get out of my stomach the mixed feelings that had been churning around the past few weeks. at times i feel helpless, used & abused, and weary. but on the other hand, i know full well that my presence and voice is needed and despite the odds serves an important role. i know full well of the good that occurs on the daily and the plight of those who go unnoticed every day yet make substantially large impacts throughout their communities.

i also briefly thought about writing a venting, emotionally impassioned plea for forgiveness and a second chance. and then the devil crept in and suggested I lash out with a scathing women suck diatribe based on perceptions. but in the end, i wrote a private, personal ode that will forever remain tucked away so that i'll never forget...her. there still might be a next lifetime. gotta be honest with myself first though. nahmean.

so although my motivation for writing this blog everyday is no longer there, i'll have to reinvent that inspiration in the form of a newfound purpose. and it's not all that newfound in the first place. this has been and will continue to be a place for me to speak about thatever the fuq i want in whatever tone and words i fell are necessary. only this time, i'll have to make even more of a commitment to it.

everything in life is a lesson learned. each action has a consequence and while I'm trying my bestest not to go awol, I'll need that freedom to explore a new range of thought. hell, maybe I'll even think about (gasp) moving. who knows. whatever i do, my peoples will be on my mind and heart heavy. because the gun clappings go down nightly around here and it's gonna take some of the villagers and maybe even a few vigilantes to get these muthafuqas in check. we got work to do, son. word to muthafuqing big bird.

and i can die when i'm done

Wasn't lies when they told you wasn't nothing to fear

The struggle ain't right up in your face, it's more subtle

I finally peeped Dave Chappelle's Block Party movie. Had me straight-up on the edge of my seat all emotional and shT. Powerful stuff. Had the ill line-up and some real head-on insight on what this life shT - what it's all about; living.

It's crazy when you too real to be free

Symbolically speaking, this George Lakoff cat penned a telling piece about understanding the meaning of freedom. Very ill analysis. As for the day's symbolism. The fireworks were blah. Just whatever. Almost got creamed by a (probably drunk) driver who decided he wanted to fly through a light all of his peoples were parked at. My aplogies to any kids who were in the area who may have overheard me. So, the little mini holiday is over so now you bTches can go back to work. Now that I am officially an employee of the city, I'm supposed to adhere to certain guidelines and shT like that. Can we now all join our hands for prayer? I'm gonna need it. Let's see how this goes. Nothing much about the work shoudl change though. Just the dynamic. Still have a relatively good amount of freedom and leeway to be flexible. Still have to deal with pains in the a$es who don't know what they're doing or are just plain irritating. But blah; whatever. (Proceeds to brush shoulder off.) I need to make the most of this month's extra free time. Do some exercising. Maybe some running. Maybe some reading. Maybe some studying. Maybe some shopping. Need to scratch off some to-do list items. Need to get over this sucky depression spell. Need to find a new damn bed and some furniture to boot. Should get the brakes checked out. Should look at getting a different car. Might go ahead and be Santa Claus mad early. Might be Scrooge and repossess shT. Need to sleep. As usual. Happy post Independence Day. The year is half over. Make that shT worth it. Word.

The Jones is the richest since dismissing the Johnson's
If you ain't saying nothing, you a system's accomplice
It should play with your conscience, do away with the nonsense
I'm overseeing anything within my circumference
This ain't a press junket, I ain't seeking responses
I stand where the people got the heat in they pocket
You mesmerized by the calm nonchalant-ness
-Black Thought (The Roots), "Don't Feel Right"

Threw dirt on the casket, the hurt I couldn't mask it

Mixin down emotions, the struggle I hadn't mastered
I choreographed seven steps to heaven
And hell
Waiting to exhale and make the bread leavened

senility sets in...I knew I forgot to mention something.

I think I mentioned about two weeks back who were strolled throughout Codman Square to pay our respects and pray with the folks who had congragated on Washington Street at the site of recent stabbing. And the memorial they had erected was huge and the block was constantly flowing with people.

Well, in the midst of all the daily happenings since then, there was a edict quietly passed to tear down all victim memorials throughout the city.

yeah uh huh. kinda numbing, huh? Kids showed up at city hall with signs that read "Don't Wait Til We're Dead" and "How Many More," while an out-of-touch councilor tells them he does not know because we'll just have to wait and see and that it is up to the people with the guns to determine that. shakes head...

So now with a distrust and contempt for public officials already high, now heads cannot grieve in peace. It is a sad but true fact that one the most noticeable things about teen attire today are the t-shirts, buttons, and other paraphernalia they adorn themselevs with in the aftermath of the passing of a friend.

Felt the spirit in the wind, knew my friend was gone for good

But, in my dealings with the Roundtable and just being more involved around the city lately, I have met many great people doing truly amazing work to make this place better for everyone. So in an effort to shed light on some of their efforts, here's some detail about what should be a productive forum on the balance of power and prayer.

Helping Our Youth Grieve

A public conversation and dialogue sparked by the recent removal of some of the memorials around the city

Goals:

• Explore a healthy communal mourning process
• Draft a strategy that will include suggestions from all affected by the memorials
• Provide ideas and suggestions to our elected and civic officials as they draft a strategy to respond to the survivors of violent crimes

Invited Guests include:

• Superintendent Paul Joyce, Boston Police Department
• Robert Lewis, The City of Boston's Center's for Youth and Families
• City Councilor Charles Yancey
• Courtney Grey, The Public Health Commission's Trauma Project
• M. Antonio Ennis, Antonio Ansaldi Clothing Company
• Jay Walsh, The City of Boston's Mayor's Office
• Tina Cherry, The Louise D. Brown Peace Institute
• Pastor William E. Dickerson, Greater Love Tabernacle Church

Family and friends, survivors of violent crimes will be provided an opportunity to share their suggestions and ideas for communal mourning. It is hoped that the strategy will encourage our City Council Members and other civic officials to introduce legislation that will allow survivors of violent crimes to grieve in a healthy manner while respecting the law, the businesses and residential communities where many of the memorials have resided.

Please join us on Thursday, July 6th, 2006 at 6:30PM At Greater Love Tabernacle Church (101 Nightingale Street, Dorchester, MA 02121)

For more information please go to www.jameswhills.com

Sponsored in partnership by Save the Youth Ministries
The Louise D. Brown Peace Institute
4Peace and the Start Peace Movement
This is a PEACE BOSTON 2006 supported event

Your whole style is loose and we gonna sew it like it's cotton

followed-up on some networking today, which went well.

put in some work as well and realized that some people truly get by.

I inhale large clouds of smoke through my chalice

riddle me this, batman.... if you run a web business, then is it wrong for me to expect for you to know some basic sht about how things aare supposed to run? And in the event that you set it up, but didn't test it, shouldn't you be able to fix it? and if you are someone else's technicall support person, how in the hell are you going to telle me that you have to call your technical support person....for some real basic shT I could do with my legs in the charles river and my hands ties behind my back a pig's intestines.

Life will keep existing while I'm shTing on opponents

and why is it that every time I bother to wash the whip, it rains seemingly the next day. but when I hold off from washing it for the very same reason, there seems to be an endless supply of sun and shT.

stop teasing me, money. i see you been really having fun up there with me this year, huh? well if you gonna put in all that work, can a brother get a hug at least. dammitt. i do not like to not be smiling or in a good mood. not one bit. kinda like the Ballou article when one of the fathers quipped, "I don't like black people who don't like black people." ok, never mind. go ahead. you got the master plan. i'll follow your lead.

Playing cowboy now you sleep with the slaves

Who You Be, son

It seems as though The Washington Post continues to contribute to the body of works asessing the plight of the Black man in America. Since the last shout-out, some more provocative pieces have come to fruition. One is a very promising tale of two young cats, who made a pact upon finishing middle school to do their part to represent to the fullest. If the daring boldness of the refusal of the scholarship they were offered were nto enough, then it should come as no suprise the passion with which the pledged their souls to make their school what it should be; a place of higher learning. And in a sense of twisted humor, another piece paints a candid portrait of a brother who has rose up the ranks of the Republican party. To be or not to be a sellout is not the question. But it does beg of a greater, more over-arching sense of purpse and its origins. It could be simplistically argued that he took that scholarship that the Ballou boys turned down. But whatever the greater meaning and lessons that are learned, maybe it really is God trying to tell you something. Maybe we should listen up and pay closer attention.

Speaking of which, I was in Uphams Corner and I had to take this photo. It is only right to include it as an accompaniment to this post. It fits in so well.

Three in the morning yawning dancing under street lights

i got Sasha Thumper on the brain

We chillin like a villain and a n!gga feelin right
in the middle of the ghetto on the curb, but in spite
all of the bullshit we on our back starin at the stars above
Talkin bout what we gonna be when we grow up
I said what you wanna be, she said, "Alive"
It made me think for a minute, then looked in her eyes
I coulda died, time went on, I got grown
Rhyme got strong, mind got blown, I came back home
to find lil Sasha was gone

the movie, Street Soldiers, will move you to tears.

it is up-front, direct testament to the willpower of those in the community willing to shed their exoskeleton and risk their lives to save lives.

living is more painful. dying is the escape.

mario rodrigues and tina chery are true warriors. strong people who have helped to reshape the fabric of a community through the sheer will of wanting to make living the escape.

the documentary premiered last night at the Strand Theater and is a compelling tale of intertwined stories of hope, compassion, fear, pain, anguish, forgiveness, anxiety, innocence, faith, and determination.

it's like there are more bullets than bicycles.

i really appreciated the frank nature of the film. son spoke from the heart with a urgency in his voice and words that needed to be heard. it ain't PG-13. it ain't full of all the answers. it's just a no chaser shot of reality of how childhoods can be lost.

i stopped crying a long time ago

it has the potential to raise many questions. it wove together the oft-connected strands of urban life; hip-hop, war, the criminal justice system, parenting, fatherhood, marriage, community centers, and public safety.

there are moments when your heart will drop, such as when tina recounts the moment her son said "this may be my last meal." it has the potential to spur change on a whole new level. this mini-review is a small step to help make that a reality.

a message from the united states ghettos:
press release | ddorchester reporter | Gun BuyBack

Sasha Thumper just wanted to live. We just want peace in the streets so our youth can see the world, live the world, and experience life while enjoying the rest of their childhood.

Peace,