I heard you got the fever for the flavor

Inspired by recent posts by people whose blogs i read, i felt the need to squeeze this in before these last two hours disappear.

Hate no one but love only a few
Franklin, Grant and yeah mom too
-Dres of Black Sheep, "Flavor of the Month"

• get more of my family & childhood friends up here to visit and enjoy the city and the midget in our environs.
• make more of an effort to reach out to my pops and his children.
• grow the record (LP) collection a keep that childhood dream alive. think Q before Bishop lost his fuqing mind.
• come up with some measurable resolutions that i can track.

• organize all of my pictures better.
• become a certified PMP.
• get that family tree built. well at least five branches/generations worth.
• write a living will.

• do more side consulting work.
• volunteer at least once a month.
• save enough to try and cop a new crib.
• redesign my business site.

• be a better mentor.
• craft a vision for my high school's alumni association and pass the torch to someone local.
• research new child care options.
• get rid of the mazda.

• take a trip to Atlanta to visit little sis.
• be nicer to local lil sis.
• be a better father, son, friend, companion.
• keep better track of my tax liabilities.

Hurry up and get a scoop before it's gone...

Kuumba / Creativity

To do always as much as we can, in the way we can, in order to leave our community more beautiful and beneficial than we inherited it.

On this New Year's Eve and the 6th day of Kwanzaa, here's a shout-out to those creative minds out there trying to do their thing the only way they know how by staying true to themselves and creating works of art that transcend barriers.

Strugglin's just a part of my day
Many obstacles have been placed in my way
I know the only reason that I make it through
Is because I never stop believin in you
Some people wonder why we here in the first place
They can't believe because they ain't never seen your face
But even when you pray, the next day you gotta try
Can't wait for nobody to come down out the sky
You've got to realize that the world's a test
You can only do your best and let Him do the rest
You've got your life, and got your health
So quit procrastinatin and push it yourself
You've got to realize that the world's a test
You can only do your best and let Him do the rest
You've got your life, and got your health
So quit procrastinatin..
-Cee-Lo

keep struggling. keep pushing. keep innovating.
keep repping. keep doing what you do.
keep being you. keep motivating. keep making moves.
keep loving. keep striving. keep it moving.
keep it thorough. i ran out of shT to keep saying...guess i ain't as creative as i had hoped.

Nia - Purpose

Who said good folks is not supposed to die
The same {n!gga} that said {n!ggaz} is not supposed to cry

To make our collective vocation the building and developing of our community in order to restore our people to their traditional greatness.

I've been BS'ing these past few days since the midget has been gone. I should be reading and writing and chilling and relaxing and balling and doing all sorts of stuff to occupy all this free time of mine. I nearly wasted the last two days in their entirety just lounging about while working remotely from the crib. So with only one day remaining in 2005, I'm trying to clean out my closet and get myself situated for all that needs to be addressed or rectified or set straight in the new year. I need to handle those resolutions and make some strong headway localy in terms of the effort I put forth on extracurricular activities. I've fallen off slightly from the hyper-active student life I once led, which was recently pointed out to me that I am no way nearly as involved as I used to be. So yeah...I can't be slacking off just yet. Too much shT going on. Too many MFers BSn on the job. Too much stuff that could use my attention. Too little time to tackle 'em all. But like it says - collective vocation - my purpose here is beyond stacking paper, copping a fly whip, and buying the bar out at the club with the fellas. I need stimulation. I need to seek more stimulation to spark a mental rebirth so that I can get out of this funk and move into a new realm of activism reminiscent of the high school days and the 2000-2001 year.

I pledge allegiance, they got my knuckles bleedin
From crawling , got these {n!ggaz} thinkin they really ballin
when they isn't
-Andre Benjamin, "In Due Time"

word. in due time.

It's like I'm fighting for freedom, writing for freedom

Like in the ghetto photo wit one n!gga in the chair
Holdin liquor in despair, gang signs in the air
I shine in spaces where time is just a glare

I went to a church Wednesday night. It wasn't for an actual church service but for a community meeting to address a lot of the despair, destruction, and death that has ravaged Boston - mostly its Black neighborhoods. It's not even a regular looking church either. It seems as if it used to be a supermarket building or something. But anyways...as non-religious as I pretend to be, I do get deeply motivated by some semblance of sprirituality. I will readily admit that my greatest fear is death. It does not consume my being, but its ever present and all-eoncompassing finality haunts me to no end. Plus, as I mentioned in the Christmas Eve posts, I won't front like I'm immune and unaware of what surrounds me. I don't do suburbs. But I need to do more. But sometimes I get annoyed with myself for saying it without really putting much actions behind those words. So there's another resolution to add to the list. Do more.

Street ministry, my poetry's a penitentiary, track is visitation
Sentences is life, I'm like chief up in this demonstration

If I don't more, who am I to complain. If I don't rep like I could/should, who am i to raise a son. If I don't speak up, speak out, and reach out to those willing and unwilling to listen, who am I to claim to be worthy of my quasi-comfortable lifestyle. More brothers are literally falling prey in this city of mine where violence pervades teens' lives and less than half of the high school's use metal detectors. So back to the community meeting. I signed up to do my part. We'll see what the follow-up will be. There were a lot of people there, many of whom I am certain are each doing their part to help and be part of the solution. But there's also a part of me that is skeptical of some people's intentions. Like Antonio Ansaldi for instance. That ain't even his last name, but I ain't even trying to go there right now. He was one of the main Stop Snitchin vendors, but no he's about to start selling shirts that say Start Peace on them. I like the concept a lot. I just hope his heat is truly in it. And yes...this would be the same Antonio..twice thou...form RSO...made me...benzino's homie. Yeah...ummm...skeptical like a muthafuq.

My ancestors, when I'm writin I see 'em, and talk wit 'em
Hoping in the promised land I can walk wit 'em
-Common, "1-9-9-9"

My family is unqiue in that is is very, very large and extended. I'm known as the person who tries to act as the glue that keeps a lot of the disparate sects in touch with each other. Actually, there's a lot of people I'm related to that are not related to each other, but just go with the flow becuase the bond is tight like that. Anyways, I am fortunate enough to have three great-grandmothers wtill alive. Two of them are big-time travelers and once again, all of them will be in the same city in two weeks. As much as I don't want to mention it, I won't get many more chances to try and get them all together for one picture with the midget. I truly love taking pictures, but there is something about an intergenerational photograph of three of your great-great-grandmothers that should go a long way to fostering a sense of identify unmatched by what any other momento can do for the midget as he grows up. So that is my goal. My moms is having her annual post-holiday party on Jan 7th and I'll be home that weekend to do some eating, some chillin, some eating, some partying, some reminiscing, some bonding, some eating, some hugging, and some picture-taking. I miss home at times. Going back keeps me grounded and reminds me of why I'm here. To represent for my peoples.