When the good die young mean the young die hood.

Ran across this article on a message board that expressed some sentiments similar to what I've been thinking lately. When the crew was down in DC last weekend, I was...ahem...forced...to finally listen to Kanye West's Late Registration in its entirety. Of course, it was a great album; yadda yadda yadda. But I did raise my eyebrow a few times when I heard Crack Music. yeah I know, who am i to be complaining when he's seemingly striving for a higher purpose, but I just feel as though he dumbs the music down too much for me to accept it at face value. It's kinda like how I fell about Jay-Z. He' s a gifted lyricist and great entertainer, but is essentially the Michael Jordan of hip-hop. There ain't no one better, but I'll be damned if he couldn't be wielding that power and influence in some more productive manners. Beyonce is a lovely woman, but really though...I don't give a fuq if the two of them are together or not. You feel me, B?

A thin line between the haters and the ones who love us
A thinner line from the freedom and the foul judges
In the streets where the snake n!ggas hold grudges
- Tragedy Khadafi, "Calm Down"

Being at the Retracing the Struggle march this past weekend brought a lot of things to the surface. You could hear the urgency in the baselines of the old-school cats (virgil woods, john lewis) who took the stage. You could almost see the aura beaming off of the heads of those new-schoolers in the middle of the struggle on the daily striving to do their part (ron bell, mariama white-hammond). You can feel the desperation in the pleas of the new-schoolers who will help lead the way tomorrow (the foundation, reflect & strengthen). Stop supporting that bullshT, son! Like they said in Sunset Park, "It's Time To Get Live. It's Time To Represent." Do your part and we'll work it out. Word.

My reputation alone should speak for itself
-Styles P, "We Gonna Make It"

Retracing The Struggle

Had a very down-to-earth Sunday, with the majoity of it completely immersed in the Retracing the Struggle march.

My girl Mari reminded me about the march on Saturday and I ran across several informational links online, so I made my way around the corner to Eliot Square to check it out. Needless to say, I didn't go back home for the next 5 hours. It started at the First Church in Roxbury and wound down Columbus Avenue to the Boston Common's bandstand.

It is also worth noting that I got to see and hear a LIVING LEGEND speak with such conviction that it truly was awe-inspiring. I'm talking about none other than John Lewis, current US Representative and former head of SNCC from back in the day.

As we made our way from Eliot Square onto Malcolm X Boulevard towards Roxbury Crosisng, we noticed we were at the tail end of the march. But the fun was just starting. Ran into my man Horace Small and finally cornered him enough to get a solid date for the next get-together; Friday, November 11th. It's on. More details to come on that one later. We also shot the shT on some other topics, including what the march was really all about. Because it sure did seem to be more of a publicity event for many of the politicians in atendance. Of course it may just have seemed that way, but there was definitely a thinly veiled air of bewilderment at just how many of them show up. It definitely piqued a lot of peoples' interest.

But anyways, I saw and met a lot of good people doing good things and heard some rousing remarks for a host of speakers at at both the church and the common. Apparently, Menino always call Mari a trouble-maker when he see her. Saw Lori Nelson, Howard Zinn, Jarrett Barrios, Diane W, Chuck T, Mike Capuano, Sam Yoon, Felix Arroyo, C Yancey, John Kerry, Shirley Owens-Hicks, Marie St-Fleur, Mel King (another living legend), Harold Zen, Ron Bell (who did his thing in putting the whole shebang together), my homegirl Afia from MIT (who is now at Harvard doing divinity & architecture), Rev Hammond and his moms, Rev Wilkerson, Ricky and Marvin and Cabral from Freedom House, Mukiya Baker-Gomez, Eroc and Optimus of The Foundation, Reflect and Strengthen (who blew me away with their performance), Mike Flaherty, Gloria Fox, Byron Rushing, Taylor Branch, Virgil Woods (who brought the house down with his call to action), Rodney Muhammad, and Michael Jacoby Brown. It was snowing on Saturday, but the gods blessed us with the perfect weather on Sunday given the time of the year for such an important and meaningful(?) event.

It Hurt Me More Than It Hurt You

At first sight, it's such a seemingly ridiculous phrase to say. But when you're the speaker, you can understand the situations when it is deemed necessary. But when you're the listener, even in the cases when it does make sense (somehow) it still can sting like a muthafuqa.

So basically, I think I made a kid cry Wednesday afternoon. We had our work session and this one kid - i mean student - has been coming in for the last two weeks. He came right when some other newcomers joined so I told them all about what my expectations would be and how I needed to test them out first. Now mind you, the big draw fo us is the money. The students have the opportunity to get paid and rake in some decent change doing stuff they enjoy.

But unfortunately, homeboy is just a bit too clueless on the whole process. I really appreciate his interest and so forth, but I can't get into the business of training them. That's what their classes and free time is for; to learn and hone their skills in graphic & web design/development. So after a rather unnervng puppy-dog faced, I had to let money know that I just am now comfortable assigning him to any real projects neither now nor in the next few months. I kdi you not when I say I think I heard him whimper. So now I feel like shT for tunring him away. I didn't tell him he couldn;t come back and tried to encourage him to immerse himself and parlay off everyone else as a resources by glancing over shoulders and taking notes.

So I guess I'll just have to wait until next week to see if he'll keep coming back. Because it would really suck a$$ to the nth degree I me saying something as simple as that ends up turning him off completely to technology or design, or worse yet, an interest in those types of careers or even school for that matter. I'd have to put a hit out on myself if I end up as the d!ckhead authority figure that doubted some youth full of potential. Awww fuq, man, I need to go and google some former teachers of mine and say thanks.

I'm livin through my son so daddy see it this way

I want him in the NFL; his brother in the NBA

I found myself listening to one of my favorite joints tonight. It's the remix to "Take You There" from Pete Rock & CL Smooth's dope album, 1994's The Main Ingredient. We can all shoot for the stars, right? Who's to say you aren't already making an impact in other people's lives? No matter the circumstance, someone is in your corner ready to hold you down.

Had a dumb busy day today, which actually started off with a wrestling match Tuesday night with El Nino, who refused to go down wthout a fight until he got himself some "jooshe". So after caving in like a little b!tch, I tried to get myself as prepared for Wed as possible, but alas the sleepsies smacked me upside the head and the next thing I know; it's 8am and time rush everything in order to get both of us ready, get him fed and dropped off, and skidaddle my non-morning-loving a$$ to the staff meeting.

Set it so I can make em all respect my fame
When brothers try to count all my chips in the game
Now let me civilize your foolish acts of gunplay
The plan of a stick man, the price in how to get away

So essentially, we need bodies. It's quite an awkward situation, but we are seriously short-staffed, but are currently interviewing for several full-time gigs. Again, take a gander and holla at the god if you or any of your peoples fit the bill. The day also involved a school visit and two client meetings, not to mention our weekly after-school work session. Luckily, lil sis looked out for the kid and relieved me temporarily so that I could essentially stay at the office unti 8pm. I tell ya...nothing is worse than being on the absolute verge of falling asleep in an important meeting convened by someone already pissed that you said you would try to make an appearance. But the highlight is that the culinary arts students at Madison are the shizznit (the food was VERY GOOD) and the Business Systems Networking Advisory Board came away with some great discussion and feedback that benefitted all who attended (and stayed awake).

So all in all, it's a step in the right direction. Plus, I ran into Chuck Turner and remembered that I need to reconnect with my man Horace so we can mesh ideas and get some ill shT poppin. So vicariously, I'm trying to leave this world a better place than I found it; albeit one day at a time. I'll try my best and hope for the best. Don't get no mo' realer than that. Word.

(in retrospect, this was one helluva divergent post. oh well....fuq it. this is my shT, son. ante up.)

Peer Pressure

Seven Things I Plan to Do Before I Die:

1. own/run a business. a real big one, ideally; with employees, payroll, corporate clients, lawyers, VPs, leasing agreements and shT.
2. get that terminal degree out of the way
3. slow down, get married, and live that 'normal' life
4. laugh at whoever wrote #3
   
5. take a few months off and travel the world, starting in africa and ending up who-knows-where
6. pull a brown sugar and put my money behind my mouth in support of real music with an ownership stake in a label or entertainment company
7. join a couple of other boards of directors and make a significnt impact in both the urban communities of Boston and Charleston for the betterment of 1) my peoples and 2) the region at-large
   

Seven Things I CAN to Do:

1. listen - i've been told my ears are big and being quiet has been known to keep me out of trouble at times
   
2. think - i ain't ya average nerd, but don't get it twisted, B. simple shT gets boring.
   
3. smile - why not
   
4. analyze - this shT ain't rocket science, son
   
5. lead - i think i've been fairly good at it thus far. just gotta get these damn stars to align correctly and we'll get it poppin'.
   
6. be calm and humble - i try my best to shelter the ego and be modest and mellow. if you think i've failed, call me out on it. cuz i don't like that arrogant shT. i might curse you out, but i will also appreciate it greatly.
   
7. say ditto to 75% of she-who-shall-not-be-named's answers to this post (i got a good kick out of that one...ok it maybe closer to 40-50%)
   

Seven Things I CANNOT Do:

1. drink likka
2. have nothing to do
3. regret shT
4. blaze an L, smoke a spliff, light some 'dro, puff a newport
5. support that wack shT (hip-hop, people, causes, fads, businesses, etc)
   
6. stick to the script
7. let life pass me by

Seven Things That Attract Me to the Opposite Sex:

1. brains - mind sense, wit
   
2. comedy - sense of humor, bonus points if she tells good jokes and/or anecdotes
   
3. logic - common sense, and some street sense too
   
4. hip-hop & black people acumen - a must
   
5. sex appeal - sass, flava, cute walk, fashion sense, T&A ratio, sexy phone voice, hip movements
   
6. wordplay - i can't expain it until you hear her use it. they gotta flow out her mouth the right way regardless of the subject matter
7. star alignment - sometimes things are just unexplainable as though you may have met her in a previous life. trust me, it does happen. when it does, the sparks are very flammable.
   

Seven Things That I Say Most Often:

1. YO
2. it's all good
3. fuq dot-dot-dot: hey yo, fuq "fill-in-the-blank"; who the fuq...; what the fuq...; how the fuq...; where the fuq...; fuq that...; when the fuq...; why the fuq...; fuq is you?
4. sure
5. yeah aiight, mufuqa
6. word. and its multiple variations: say word. word up.
   
7. we can work something out

Seven Celebrity Crushes:

1. Queen Latifah - a true masterpiece
   
2. Nia Long - love jones
   
3. Taraji Henson - baby boy
   
4. Chrystale Wilson - authenticity
   
5. Mary J Blige - you remind me
   
6. Monifah - it's alright, lay with you, i miss you
   
7. Monica Arnold - gotta love a women who had a song with the same name as one of your favorite gangstarr joints
8. honorable mention - ajai sanders, tisha campbell-martin, cheryl 'salt' james, loretta devine, beyonce
   

Seven People I Want to Do This:

1. my two sisters
2. she-who-did-this-already-and-suggested-i-do-it-too
3. the four other scraggler mufuqas who happen to read this

Have Fun In Eternity

What's so wrong with that notion? Nothing at all unless you are the firefighter who got told that by a homeless man who just stuffed pumpkin with electrical wiring. Now, aside from the scare tactic employed, I can dig the heads-up. Have fun in the here and now. Word...now I definitely can dig that.

As for what type of fun should be had, well that's a whole 'notha discussion but it includes the usual carefree stuff but with a hearty dose of real shT. I'm aspiring to be more healthy, work out more thoroughly, be more involved in local community issues and events, eat healthier meals, read more, and have more 'meaty' conversations with people with 'meaty' goals and aspirations in their lives. But with that comes the inevitable trade-offs. Will I be able to continue my blogging pace, which albeit is not all that consistent, has been one of my personal accomplishment highlights of the year. If I eat too, too healthy, will I no longer salivate for my moms' sweet potatoes, Aunt G's red rice, Aunt E's sweet potatoe pie, Grandma W's coleslaw, and Grandma M's cake? If I liste to too much radio will I become fan of Mike Jones, Young Jeezy, and TI? And if I lift too much weights will my neck disappear and my jump shot fall short to the point where I no longer can muster up the interest to play ball. Ok never mind, that shT just ain't happening. But really though...those what ifs just skim the surface.

So I guess this ramble is just a mere daydream about life's give-and-take. The nip-and-tuck of our personal lives revolves around the interactions, experiences, stories, and anecdotes that are collected over the years. So 'making the most out of it' really is all about maximizing your happiness for that self-satisfying emotional-ROI. We can lead busy lives and be wrapped up in the everyday struggle of the here and now, but there are some things I just couldn't trade for the world. One is my happiness and the other is who I am at the core. I've got my goals and aspirations and hopes laid out and they are all subject to change but still remain true to who I am, where I'm from, and who I'm trying to be...me.

Stereotypes of a black male misunderstood
And it's still all good

It's Another Name For Life Fighting

They say home is where the hate is
My dome is where fate is
I stroll where souls get lost like vegas
Seen through the eyes of rebel glasses
Pray to god that my arms reach the masses
The young smoke grasping graspless jungles
Rubberband together in cashless bundles
-Common, "My Way Home"

Whew....just got back from a whirlwind trip (award tour...with muhammad my man). Going each and every place...

So anyways, just trying to get situated. No real conciseness is possible in recapping the weekend other than I roll with some of the most hilarious mufuqas on the northern hemisphere. No, really. Words can barely explain the whole story of the massive amount of random, situational jokes and one-liners that rolled off of folks' tongues this weekend.

I expected to shell out dough and they were suprised I went because I am well-known for my vocal unpleasantries with local clubs when I do not get in free; especially when I know the promoter, bouncer, or DJ. So basically, down in DC, I don't know a damn soul (being a small fish in the ocean), and I was the designated driver. So I had to come out the pocket for some serious ends, but the club scene was very live. Although it's not something I can see myself doing too much though, because after awhile, that shT was just WAY too fuqing crowded. But the DJs repped for the most part. Heard some good throwbacks and some ill sets, plus ran into a lot of folks from up and down the east coast that I knew, including several whom it has been years since we last said whattup.

So yes, the Howard Homecoming field trip for 2005 was indeed a good time had by all, well predominantly all. Some fellas were on the receiving end of jokes more than the giving, but I digress. While the trip had its inclinations for all-out wildin', it also was truly a great male-bonding experience. Yes, it sounds dumb cheesy, but the shT helped redirect energies, recharge batteries, and chill with my peoples. Naturally, there's gonna be head-butting instances and some modus operandi that doesn't sit well with everyone, but when it's all said and done; it's whateva. nahmean.

my memory is quickly fading, but here is what I remember laughing at hardest...

-> Yo, Bruce Mobile! Where You At?!
-> S* calling room 730 and then asking, "Where You At?!"
-> C's phantom date and T*'s conspiracy theories
-> "What?! Are you pushing damn near thirty?!"
-> S* running across the street in the rain to McDonald's to get a number
-> "$40 for parking?! Fuq that! Move that cone!"
-> L* the expert antagonist
-> "Gimme my fuqing burger back!"
-> DJ Text Message
-> A dozen people standing in line at Checkers at 4am and in unision yell out, "Broke Phi Broke. We Ain't Got It!"
-> S* trying to holla at a member of the opposite sex. Upon realizing that she's deaf, he starts to whisper.

tears...literally...i'm laughing

If you looked in my life and seen what I've seen.

Guess who just woke up, took a high-arching pot-o-gold on the otha side of the rainbow piss, and then ladi back down on my thigh whilst farting? yeah...you guessed it. apparently, I didn't rough him up enough tonight so he figured he'd crack his eyes open and see what I was up to. As a matter of fact, the dude keeps peeping every few minutes too. I think I'm gonna have to shut everything down and call it a night in order to get him back into REM-land.

but before i go...

here's some random tidbits for ya. i love hip-hop like my life depended on it like oxygen. yet, there are more than a few r&b joints that get me open like fallopian tubes. not the sappy, wishy-washy shT, but some strong laidback gems that leave me in as much of a trance as when i'm listening to posdnous, buckshot, or rakim. jill, erykah, india, alicia, donnell, troop, and mary j amongst others. and this may j pic says much more than just a pose. i can see my adolescence just by taking a glimpe. so yeah, if you see what i see then you feel me.

so anyways, i like to keep a lot of shT private because that's my nature, but i'll share shT every now and then. so anyways, there's this very intriguingsugar momma who has my feathers in a bunch. While the mystique of being single again is enticing for some key reasons, i'm not fond of wasting time with boring broads...yes you read right; broads. it ain't that serious, but ot all women are created equal. and while we never know who is truly meant for us, it's the not trying part that really renders us helpless. so here's my deep breath and we'll see what happens next. Here's hoping for a royal flush instead of a full house.

Plus, my sis just got a job, but also just ended her long-term relationship, so we're in the same boat on that end. But I am extremly proud of how she's been holding down the fort all by her lonesome in ATL. Like they say, against all odds, real strength arises in the face of adversity. Learning curves are an amazing thing when the growth s so dramatic. I'm honored, proud, and humbled to be able to say that I'm her brother. Word up.

Don't buy drugs. Become a pop star, and they give you them for free.

and yes, the midget is still up at 2:30 i the morning. i fell like doctore frankenstein. "what have i done? i've created a light-skinned owl!"

Life is full of interruptions and complications

Having a bit of a whirlwind week....dumb hectic at work...midget still restless at night...still haven't packed for the road trip...owe some people return phone calls...amongst other things.

My homegirl Mari is amazing. she is super-well-connected within's boston non-profit community and holds it down admirably as project hip-hop's executive director. Apparently, PHH has been fielding calls left and right from all over because we seem to have become the default youth-focused organization to which to turn. and that is not a problem at all. But i'd like to see it translate into some increased funding. but anyways, the moral of this story is two-fold. about 3-4 weeks ago, Mari let us know that she was going down to gulfport, miss to offer some tangible help in the form of an extra body. I was soo proud of her, while a bit embarassed that I could (did) not make a similar sacrifice.

So anyways, she also got in the habit of blogging and set up shop next door. she has some really great first-hand commentary on her two-week excursion to the Gulf Coast and her experiences while there. Her most recent post however, is very moving, and I'll let you read it for yourself. But it just goes to show you, that as much as people struggle for a fair shake, there's always a wall of hinderance with which to contend. Here's to hoping that Kristy gets a fairer shake than the one she's gotten so far...because that shT is real fuqed up, duke. And as mad as this shT may make you, then you wind up reading sensationalist journalism like this to cast an even dimmer cloud of skepticism over Katrina evacuees' heads. But you gotta give my homegirl ChezNiki props for already sending in her op-ed letter to let 'em know she don't play that shT. South-Bronx. South-South-Bronx!

Inerestingly enough, Mari's blog reminds me somewhat of the blog of my other homegirl SistaNubia, who is currently in Zambia as a Peace Corps volunteer. Some of the stories that she has shared are all-in-one eye-opening, enlightening, captivating, funny, touching, and just plain interesting. Every time I read a new post on her joint, I feel like Sincere when him and Tionne were in the truck. If the reference eludes you, don't sweat it because only a select few will understand the connection and appreciate it. All of these sisters give me hope and affirmation that a true spirit of social consciousness comes irregardless of socioeconomic status, education, gender, ethnicity, race, or hair texture. It comes from knowing you are, where you've been, and where you're going. And if you don't know where you're going, if you at least got a plan; you can always figure shT out when you get there. Nahmean?

Minds That Think Alike

Apparently, I'm not the only one who had this on my mind lately. Found this image and accompanying text in random Word document today on a public computer terminal. It's mad refreshing when you realize others are on the same wavelength as yourself. Whoever created this file, this toast is for you.

"For those wearing the "Stop Snitchin" t-shirts...if any of your loved ones ever get shot or killed and you wanna know who committed the crime, should we abide by your shirt and not "snitch" if we've witnessed the incident? Something to think about!!"

Stop B!tchin

just making observations...

alas, here is tangible proof of the counter-productiveness of these fuqing shirts. i saw one today on a kid walking out of Madison Park HS. i'm really trying to reduce my N!gga verbal output, but shT like this skews the numbers. expressions, hip-zepi, manhattan's.....i'm coming for ya...i thinkwe're overdue for a boycott...

...dudes are funny. they'll ask you why you've been MIA but know damn well they didn't bother to call you when they obviously had a phone bank going to coordinate their activities. hence the definition of situational irony...

anyways...

so I didn't make it down to DC this weekend, but the morning after wasn't as distressing as i thought it would be. i am a bit isappointed in the seemingly minimal amount of media coverege that it generated; albeit i no longer have a TV to watch it so who am i complain. so i've only read this one piece from cnn. but i'm thinking maybe c-span has some good clips. hmm...let's see...

more irony from the globe. i came across three articles about Mayor Menino that have a well-put-together argument for the issues I hinted at in an earlier post. this one gets to the heart of the comparison i made between menino and joe riley. this column highlights of lot of issues that should be discussed and put more in the open in this current - and a bit of a yawner - mayoral race. and finally, this article beats arond the bush a bit, but put questions about race issues front and center, which is very refreshing, regardless of how short the article falls in really appling some tangible pressure or inciting dialogue. but i guess it's a start.

lastly, i think I'm gonna have to try and make the debate this Wednesday amongst the at-large city councilors at UMass-Boston. reading some of the candidates' answers to a laundry list of 6 key questions definitely puts a lot on the table in terms of narrowing down what ground to cover, but i like how thorough this simple story is and look forwrad to more.

I find it healthy, to conversate with myself

I don't think it's actually insomnia that keeps me going in the middle of the night - prime time - it's just a part of life that I've come to accept and embrace. So anyways, I found a song that I used to play daily a few years back. It was on that Queensbridge album anchored by Oochie Wally. The song I'm talking about is "Self-Conscience" with Prodigy and Nas. I remember being the driver one day and forcing the accompanying crew to listen to the whole song and let it soak in. I can hear my man Ceph's words now; "dam, son....that was kinda deep."

Speak your thoughts, put your all in it
Whatever's in your mind, spit it
Place your anger on the page, release tension on the tape
A stress verse, seem to be what they most thirst

Well you may not find the song's lyrics or perspective all that deep, but I did. It's just one of those things that I could connect with. It wasn't necessarily either of their best verses, but it spoke volumes about real life. The real life of cheebah-inspired poetry and the real life that is the concrete jungle. But of course, let's not get it twisted. Life is damn sure not only about mayhem and gloom. It's about vitality, growth, and redemption. Life is good and life is great. Living it for every second is what makes it worth...well...living, right? So anyways, here's the track so you can check it our for yourself. I've always thought the angle was ill. Plus, I heard some shots were fired in front of Slade's tonight, so it just got me to thinking about rational shT even more because as much as there are people who rep the right way, there are those muthafuqas in the world whose sole existence seems to be to specifically fuq up a good thing. Plus, I've been meaning to find a picture of iminy Cricket from a few posst back.

...you keep me hype when I'm writin
Kept me on point in the night when it might go down
Keep me eyes wide in the daytime as well
Kept me focused on what's real and nuttin else
I find it healthy, to conversate with myself
I kick it with my delf (I kept you alive, all these years)
It's that inner voice you shoulda took head to and shT

The Untold Story of Emmett Louis Till

Why is Massachusetts one of the states NOT showing this movie? I need answers. This is a movie I want to see. Fuq Domino. Good night.

Snob Appeal: the elite meritocracy...

once again...amongst other shT.

Interesting article in the Boston Globe entitled, Secret societies, a synopsis of a new book by Jerome Karabel that exposes much of the history of discrimination by the three top institutions of higher education in our nation. And to think that the cuurent president, L. Summers, was just an aberration. Yeah right. Some of the people are really nice and are great scholars, researchers, teachers, and people overall. But seriously though...fuq hahvud yahd.

In this other article, some chick had the nerve to say she "had no choice but to stay inside on weeknights until she turned 21 this year" because there wasn't much else to do but drink. And someone actually voted her in as SGA president?! Sounds like more than a few screws are loose. But really though...this has got to be hyperbole in its finest satirical form, or she is....like....so...wack. Word.

Anyways. NSBE did its thing as usual this week with some good showing. For starters, the professional chapter had its monthly meet and since somebody decided to quit their old job, it ended up being held at my job piece. Let's not forget to mention that I was also supposed to be the primary speaker/presenter and that the midget is with me on Wednesdays, which is also the day for early-morning staff meetings and my after-school session. So yes, it was tiring typing all that much less going through it. But the metting went well, the turnout was decent and we laid out a goof plan of action for being more proactively involved in helpping push technical (or STEM) careers to local youth. I got some good feedback on the ideas I presented and now it's time to roll the sleeves up and make it happen. Coincidentally, I came across this other article that speaks to additional efforts to attack the talent drought head-on. Naturally, there's always bound to be some scorn thrown in Gates' direction, but those are the breaks when you are that rich. But even more promising was this other article about local efforts to incorporate more engineering curriculum into the educational curriculum. Holy rusted metal, Batman. I think we've foudn the jackpot.

But on the real, my man Carl Mack repped hard on Thursday night for the student chapter at Northeastern. I pretty much know his speeches (sermons) verbatim by now, but it was amazing to see how engaged the audience was. You can usually catch more than a few bamas not paying attention, but he had them more than buckshot when he was shorty. And that's saying something if you know what I'm saying. And I've tried to consciously make an effort to not use the N-word and I think I do a fairly good job of keeping it from leaving my lips, but he maks the greatest case for not using it. Just think...what do you think was the last word Emmit Till heard in his life? What about anyone who was lynched back in the day? Yup...that shT'll have you seriously thinking about your whole perspective on everything from the n-word and how some justify it with the term of endearment argument to how its use is not fully censored n the media. It's that simple and it's that ill, but it's also that real.

And lastly, we didn't make it down to the Millions More Movement. There's probably a lot I could have done to make more of a concerted effort to get down there, but alas, what's done is done. I'll stick to the confines of this rainy-weekend in Boston and suck it up. Maybe it's for a reason that the logistics just didn't work out. Whatever the case, I'm in full support of the cause so don't get it twisted. I can recall it like it was yesterday....'long live the spirit of the million man march.' Truly unforgettable. So in the meantime, I'll dope up the midget on cold medicine to curb his coughing, try to catch the alma mater's Homecoming festivities, and maybe hit up the Boston Latino International Film Festival. Favela Rising is a dope movie I've been wanting to see for a while, plus there's this regular movie called Domino that looks promising too. But then again, I'd want a date for that last one, so it doesn't look that'll be happening. Oh well. I'll just write a poem Sunay night and pretend I did go on a date. Ok maybe not...I ain't that fuqing creative.

Hear Jack Welch Talk About "Winning"

Homecoming Schedule: Friday, October 14

Sustaining Success Forum: Jack Welch, Former CEO of General Electric
2:00-4:00pm (Q&A and book signing)
Ell Hall, Blackman Auditorium
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Life Goes On...in baby steps

The Cooper River Bridge has evolved. Yes, for those who have ever been to Chucktown, you know what that means. The picture above is a view of the recent demolition (and detonation) of the Pearman Bridge. In the back ground, you will notice the new bridges expanse as the smokes clouds hover. Seeing these photos of the bridge 'blowing up in the world' made me think about the progression and stagnation that has come to symbolize my hometown. Like any native, we all have a deep love for the pace that we truly call home. But just as true to life is the disdain we have about some things that never really sat well with us.

Like Boston, Chucktown has a long-serving incumbent mayor. And while he has done a lot of good, there always seem to be a lack of effort in my opinion for how Joseph Riley has impacted the Black community; much the same way people here in the Bean feel about Thomas Menino. Speaking of Menino, why am I heated that just a few hours ago I finally came up with a great, poignant question to ask him, but alas, I'm about two weks too late. Oh well...I'll have to pop it at some other inopportune and seemingly inappropriate time. But at least I finally have nailed down the single question that epitomizes all of my frustrations with this city's political process. But I've gone off on enough of a tangent with that one so I'll chill. Anyways...back to chuctown.

I think about the great strides that have been made to improve the city's standing. We are known the world-round as one of the firendliest places. As much as we curse, my family is living proof of that. I could't count on on abacus the number of people the have been adopted (or assimilated) over the years. There has been much to improve public education, the tourism industry, and the economic staturs of the region as a whole. But still...there alwas seems to be a disconnect. I can call up anyone and get a quick pulse of what's really going on in people's daily lives. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Hmmm....why does that sound familiar? So-and-so got locked up. Oh word. Sorry to hear that. Somebodys cousin got shot. Dam. My condolences.

And lastly, well not lastly, but for now I'l end it there; the political involvement of our people has neer been absent but deeply lacking in tangible impact. My man Kwadjo Campbell was a beacon of hope for a lot of people and did a helluva lotta good, but always seemed to be the bad guy in the media and mainstream Charleston's eyes. I helped in get elected back in the day and although he recently caught a serious, I wish him well, although he did fuq up my plans to come back home and run shT like Michael J Fox., but it's all good. I'll just have to find myself a new Manchurian Candidate. But yeah, I kinda felt like lamenting on the neutrality that the imager of that bridge coming down represents. I didn't go into the background of how people's homes (mostly Black and low-income) were steamrolled through eminent domain to make room for the new bridge. Or how economic development in the Black community is sparse (yet it does exist, just not very well balanced amongst classes). It's odd when you feel indebted to your hometown folks to come back and try to help make things better than they were when you came up, but find yourself wanting to be just as involved in the community where you now call home. I guess it's a win-in and lose-lose on both fronts. Stepping up is the first step. Stepping in and making my voice heard is the second. I'd be letting my chucktown people down by moving thousand miles away to sit back and relax and let life pass me by. Ma Dukes ain't raise no punk b!tch. So here's to a new day in Charleston and the promise of a better tomorrow for ALL its residents. Because if the current system does not step up and meet the needs of the people (and public school students), then we all fail; them and all the transplants who have gone on to make moves in life and let the status quo remain just that; the way it is. Word.

Cause I'm the miggidy miggidy miggidy Mack Daddy

My man Car Mack is coming back to the bean tomorrow for a special guest apprearance at the alma mater. The topic is cultural responsibility. Conscious and GhettoUprising, y'all listening? You'll be eating off his food for thought for days. He will make you wanna jump, jump. Trust me.

Knocks Me Off My Feet

'I don't wanna bore you with my troubles,' but there's something about posting shT up on here knowing people you know and you don't know may be reading it and letting it sink into their daily lives. That's the power of the written word. I look back at the harrowing times of my first year of college when I was about 10 minutes and 2 blocks away from being an English major. I think about all the people whom I have encountered in my life; who I have met, have impacted, and have touched or influenced me. Thinking about near-regrets can get to be a pretty heavy ordeal, so I try not to dwell on them too much. But sometimes you just can't help pondering life's what ifs. From big-scope, life-changing events of significance to the everyday struggle, we can become so engulfed in life's t-crossing and i-dotting that we forget to take a time-out just to say, "yo, i'm here, doing my thing, trying to live, and that's all good with me. So fuq what anyone else thinks." I don't have too many complaints...ok well maybe I do. Even now, I find myself torn between a variety of decisions, alternatives, choices, and options. But isn't that the essence of life; a lifetime of millions of choices (multiple-choice, true/false, and essay) with varying degrees of outcome and consequence behind each door. Sometimes we take the path of least resistance or the road less traveled that no one else dared to venture down before. But in the grander scheme of things, I see it as the logic in not trying to force anything or not sacrificing what you hold dear. It may be fate. It may be destiny. But whatever doors you choose, those are the cards you get dealt. How you play your hand in the next step in the strategy game of life is up to you. I'm far from complete, and the usage of the phrase 'a work in progress' is getting to be a bit too commonplace for my ears, so I'll have to try and think of some alternative shT to say in its place. So until then, keep doing what you do, living how you live, loving how you love, and being who you be. All grammatical (and polictical) correctness can go to hell every now and then. Plus, it's not like I was an English major or nuthin...

let's play a game of charades. who am i?
-Papoose, "Charades"

I bathe in basslines, rinse in riffs, dry in drums

As I sit back and enjoy some more tunes I'm intrigued at the thought there are probably a lot of new Common fans out there who - while they will admit that he's dope - don't truly understand the depth of the brother's skills and rep. Resurrection just came on and whew...let's just say I'm gonna have to link you to the lyrics and the file so you can check it for yourself. And like Defair and Evidence said on Focused Daily, "that raw deal shT, that real hip-hop."

I be the in 'cause the brother holdin' glocks is out

Doing some work-work, yeah real work on the holiday and listening to some good music. I really need to start considering gettin an iPod. I got some true thrw back gems on thes ehard drives like a mutha. Anyways, the 'I be the in' line is from De La's "Eye Patch" form the Buhloone Mind State album. I reember going to a concert and seing them an Tribe perform. I went dolo and had a great time just shouting shT out and reciting the rhymes verbatim (and on-beat) with them. Mind you, Midnight Marauders and Buhloone Mind State came out at the same time. Do you remember the first time you heard "Breakadawn"? Memories...

Anyways, my ass hurts, my stomach is grumbling and my body is mad at me because we haven't really been playing much ball in the last month. So I think I'm gonna have to go ahead and renew my alumni membership today. The gym is open just abou everyday from 5 in the morning until 1am. So I need to come up with a regiment and stick to it. For too long, I've only been a athlete and not a weight-lifter. I never really liked lifting weights. The shT was just so fuqing boring. I damn near kiled mysef one-time because I was tired from playing ball and damn near fell asleep while working out upstairs. I need to at least give it one last hurrah and cop a six-pack before the handles get outta control. I wanna rock a wife-beater with some pride at least once in my lifetime. Ok I'm cracking myself up right now. Feeling kinda lonely, so I'm listening to a hodgepodge of stuff on WinAmp, sitting in my boxers, editing HTML code while the days snakes away.

recent tracks that just played: faith evans' i love you, cnn & nas calm down, tahj mahal squat that rabbit, common & sadat x 1999, kwame the man we all know & love, jeru jungle music, special ed freaky flow, donnell jones' this luv, diamond d stunts blunts hip-hop, gza's cold world, and cocoa brovaz' super brooklyn remix. beautiful music.

Subtly Brainwashed

we say gunshots inna de air
but do you really mean it?

we got dip sets full of nit-wits and dip shT
who grip tecs and mumble dumb shT
instead of practising how to spit
while I got plhegm backed up from 93, duke

the game ain't changed
being a lazy b!tch on the mic is just a sign of the times
becuase nowadays we throw up geometric gang signs

Don't let your uniqueness become your weakness

Had the NSBE New England Zone Fall Conference today at Northeastern. It was well put-together and we had some folks from outta state cme through and bless us with their presence and knowledge. My man Tony from NSBE HQ gave the closing remarks in the afternoon with the theme of Stepping Up and Stepping In. It was a very good, high quality speech and he three in the uniqueness/weakness line and I was like whoa, son...you're really dropping some major jewels over there. Tuck ya chain, duke! Anyways, it was very well scripted and though-out speech that the crowd obviously enjoyed. So I felt obliged to shout him out on here officially becuase he's come through for me so often in the past. But that one phrase will definitely stick ou in my mind for a while. It's resonating right now, son. Feel me on this one.

Cuz you put the hue in human

My dunny Harold Clemens has a recent guest article over at The Black Commentator entitled, "An Evolution of Lies." Pretty interesting and I also found it ironic, because the 'hue in human' line is from the same Black Star track I paraphrased in my previous post. Frustrated brothers be thinking alike, huh. Word.

And speaking of frustration, while I've gotten over the demise of the Chappelle Show, I fond the words to the piece Dave performed on Def Poetry. Classic status.

Fuq Ashton Kutcher,
The public image butcher.

His shows a hit
and I can't stand that shT.

I don't even know him
but I hate his guts.

If he punks me,
I won't sign the release.

Because whenever he punks
black people, it always involves the police.

He even has all the white folks at home rolling.
Brandy, did you know that jewelry you was stolen?

'But hey, I'm a star.' Well stop shining
and get your ass out that car.

Well, he wouldn't like it, if me and my friends
Just before dawn busts in his house with some ski masks on.

Put a gun in his mouth and turned on the lights
just when he screams out, I'll yell out SSSIIIIKKKKEEEE.

Can you sign this release because I want to entertain people with your fear.
You punk b!tch.

Because Dave Chapelle is a genius.

The fire's in my eyes and the flames need fannin

Let's back it up a minute. The first (and only) Black Star was truly on some classic status. One of my personal favorites, KOS, featured Talib Kweli dolo. It has a very simple beat and mellow melody but it thumped hard and resounded very loudly with a lot of people, namely mysef. I'm no all-knowing individual who is fully knowledgable of all that goes on around me or well-versed in curent events, historical contexts, and landmark literary figures. I'm just trying to live each breath a little more fully than the previous.

Knowledge Of Self is like life after death
With that you never worry about your last breath
Death comes, that's how I'm livin, it's the next days
The flesh goes underground, the book of life, flip a page

I am currently fascinated by the phenomena that is a learning curve. It can be interpreted in a few ways, but all boil down to a cnsistent theme; how well progress is made from cluelessness towards awareness. As yo cn see i the picture, the midget is very happy taking a shower. In fact, he enjoys getting his face wet and washing his hair. I don't remember that being the case with any of the rugrats I babysat when I was younger. But I guess it's one of the trade-offs with him I have to enjoy. So this week, along with our familiar routine or basic nouns, letters, and numbers, he's making more literal associations. I swear I was ready to choke him out if I saw one more damn MBTA bus on Friday. I remember being in 4th grade being the lookout-guy and having to shout at the top of my lungs, 'DA BUUUSSSSS!', everytime I caught that big yelloe behemoth coming out way, because of course, we were never actually at the stop. Let's just say deja vu like a mutha. All you cold hear for blocks, BUUUSSSSS. But he's learning. He'll lear more. And I'll learn right along with him. I look back on some simple things that I didn't do as a youth that would have made my adulthood a bit more fulfilling. Dictionaries are great. All these smart people have been stumping me lately, so I go and read up on what I'm missing and then feel all well-informed and ready to take on the world with my new word. So my goal is to let him enjoy his childhodd, but subtly plant little seeds in his brain so he'll know what time is; figuratively of course. Can't be skimming over pages in our book of life together. Word.

And you could tell, by how her titties hung

I met this girl, when I was ten years old
And what I loved most she had so much soul

When I was ten years old, I was in the fifth grade. It was my second year at Buist Academy. I still have the yellow yearbook from that yea and I look back through it with mixed feelings. I can remember a lot of what happened that school year, but cannot quite pinpoint why I have certain notations next to people's name. Or in some cases, why I scribbled and 'slandered' a few folks. Ok, well I do know why that happened, but let's just say things went over better in middle school. But the real reflection for me is how much life changes. In my quest to reconnect with those I've lost touch with, I've found some old friend and family and friend of the family that were older and younger than I who have gone to do their thang as adults. My cousin Chris is doing his thing at school in NC, my younger cousin Jen is doing her thing at school in FL, her big brother (who is fuqing huge) finished school and is now doing his thing as a teacher, and family friend Shirrell is doing her thing at school playing d2 ball. I like it when we go out into the world and let our creative juices flow. It's even iller to see that they all still have a strong sense of self and awareness of where they're from and where they're headed.

She was old school, when I was just a shorty
Never knew throughout my life she would be there for me

I guess I kinda strayed there, huh? What I thought would be a hip-hop related post turned into a run-of-the-mill reflective paragraph on life. But hey, hip-hop and life go hand-in-hand with me so it's not that much of a disconnect, now is it. But yeah, back to the fifth grade. I can remember rocking the four-M (Malcolm, Martin, Mandela, Marcus) shirts and the africa joints on my neck. I had a high-top fade (flatop) and even a step (which ended up in the yearbook). If you are clueless as to what I mean by a step-flatop, don't bother googling. Just give up now. But seriously, I look back and wonder wheer all the time went and how the mystery of life would be diffrent if we could retrace our steps to do things just a little bit differently.

She didn't have a body but she started gettin thick quick
DId a couple of videos and became afrocentric
Out goes the weave, in goes the braids beads medallions
She was on that tip about, stoppin the violence
About my people she was teachin me
By not preachin to me but speakin to me
in a method that was leisurely, so easily I approached
She dug my rap, that's how we got close

So I guess this is simply a night-time lament on how things were, could be, should be, can be, and will be. Life is what you make it and I'm trying to do what I can to live it up, have fun, and meet my maker with something to show for my time here amongst the living. Just trying to make sure my word is bond and that bond is strong....

Stressin how hardcore and real she is
She was really the realest, before she got into showbiz

...Not to mention keep my shT straight so that the midget knows what to do and what not to do, and possess the ability to think critically at all times and be able to weigh options and make choices based on alternatives and consequences, because that's what it all boils down to me. Recognize real, respect the realness, but live in reality. Whether it's a gut feeling, split-second decision, or a well thought-out vetting process, actions speak louder than words. So I'll make my pledges, promises, vows, scheduled meetings, appointments, field trips, workshops, and the like, but at the end of the day I just want to always be able to look back and say, 'yo, you know what, I came, I saw, and I repped like a mutha, son. word up.'

Legendary Status: I Used to Love H.E.R.

The Ave

Street movement in print.

While I'm sitting here waiting for all these files to upload to the web server, I figure now is as good as any time to show some luv for The Ave magazine. I subscribed online a few weeks back and finally got my first issue last week. It is truly a refreshing piece of work.

A fellow NEU alum is one of the masterminds behind the publication and to the hip-hop lifestyle that has been under-appreciated as a cultural force. He stresses the most important part of the revolution, is to speak the truth and promote empowerment in an equitable environment.

It's hop-hop journalism for the soul. None of that overly-fluffy pillow talk with unnecessary verb tenses. Just pure, uncut good writing on topics of substance. My first taste has TI on the front cover and Farrakhan on the back. The stories are not the same run-of-the-mill dumb a$$ interviews about favorite foods and sexual positions and the layout is hella on-point. There was even an insightful piece about the state of public education, whcih is some real shT to be talking baout in a hip-hop publication. But that's just it. It's a poart of the culture. Embrace it and you will enjoy. Definitely something worthy of my dollar bills. (although the damn CEO won't return my phone calls but it's all good). Brothers be busy. Word.

Details:
Africa's Gateway interview
SoundSlam interview
Chronic Magazine interview
EUR Web news

Nahmean

This is the piece I scribbled in the dark at the Lizard Lounge on the night of Sunday, September 11th. My homegirl Iyeoka let me borrow a scrap piece of paper and pen she had in her bag and I hit the stage with these brief words with the Jeff Robinson Trio as the backdrop:

Pick pockets move with swiftness while my eyes remain transfixed on the realness
With age comes maturity, security, and senility
Although the proportions never seem quite balanced

So I find myself on edge on the daily
Battling Jiminiy Cricket's instigating ass
While I steadily morph into a talking and walking contradiction
Nahmean?

Time traveling was never my forte
Just today I heard a song which I assume is entitled Unbreakable and it put me in a damn good mood
Yet in good stead is what I'm reaching for
A hark back to the days of Stetsasonic when even chubby kids could hold it down on the dance floor

So I'll just keep the party hype by continuing to write for myself to soothe my own soul while dencouncing proper spoken word etiquette
Because just maybe; I'll call it a night and stuff this crumpled sheet into my back pocket, scurry back to the lab, pull the covers over my eyes, and just blog for dolo

But then again...the Minstrel Show may g'on ahead and be the jump-off without me
And you know that ain't right
Nahmean?

In retrospect, I'm not feeling it as much as the other ones I wrote and read. So I need to find them and get 'em typed up before they get lost forever. Keeing track of all these itty-bitty pieces of paper is like a Writer's Cock-Block. Ain't this a b!tch.

I'm a b-boy standing in my b-boy stance

Just got back from hitting up both the Emerald Isle and the Lizard Lounge. The weekend was a bit slow [but I did manage to get snap I some flicks I liked] so I said fuq it and did both venues. I even peeped an old friend of mine and we ended up playing ball at Washington (Malcolm X) Park for a good 2 hours. Two game sof 3-on-3 and 2 full court runs and it was a wrap. I guess the street lights just don't come on at night once October hits. I understand the logic, but damn yo...it was nice outside. And we were busting their a$$, son. Work wit me, yo.

Anyways, a thin crowd was up in the spot as the Dynamic Duo of Comedy did their thing. I'm guessing Tracy Morgan's two shows downtown pulled folks that would have normally been there. That Carlos DeSoto cat was there again. Not as funny the first time around, but we're all works in progress, right? Another dude, Moe(?), tried out some new material he had; some funnier than others. And of course, although she didn't get on-stage this week, a lot of jokes seem to revolve her Pumpkin.

As for the Lizard Lounge, I was right, Gail Burton is on some other shT. I got there mad late coming from Fields Corner, but i still wa sable to catch her in the final stretch. The crowd was thick and she obviously had some of her peoples in the house, which added to the vibe. The open mic list was dumb long, so I begrudgingly plooed my name down next to the number eight and went back to my seat and started writing. I don't think what I finished with was as substantial as last week's words, albeit the reception was decent. So I ain't gonna complain. I'll make that this week's motto. No complaining. If it ain't working; fuq it. Can't be inhaling exhaust pipes when the engine light is on because of a blown fuse.

When you ego trip you just lose your luggage

"And if God propel us to the top, I won't go pop
No need to act a fool in public"
-Phonte, "Watch Me"

musically speaking: click here for a good laugh and click here for a the best Minstrel Show album review by none other than my man Flash, who is an institution in his own right.

asleep late and up early...thinking about what to do today...what to do tonight...and then how the next week should play out.

should i go to Lizard Lounge tonight and make yet another attempt at verbal immersion? or should just hit up the rest of the Roxbury Open Studios sites, play some ball if the weather holds up, and clean up the crib? awww fuw it...lemme try to do it all. it's not like my phone is ringing off the hook or anything anyway. the feature at the LL tonight is Gail Burton. I'm feeling the purpose behind her New Freedwoman Project and hope to hear some really great stuff. I only caught the tail-end of last week's feature, but it was obvious that she was a yawner. And speaking of which, I think I got some nice pics yesterday, so I'll try to get them up on the pics site soon. As far as Saturday goes, I hit up the 2 venues right here near ths Roxbury crib. Got to meet miss parker once again and bought soe fabulous gift cards from her too. She's giving me inspiration to finish that mural project. "Just keep taking pictures." Word. Just keep living. Let all the dumb shT roll off your back. Stay calm and collected and you'll be aiight.

So I'm sitting here...

and the little fella that has been whining all day just decided he doesn't want to sleep tonight so he starts doing back-flips in his sleep. Let's see how this works out..