We been struggling since single shot gauges

Without the guidance of our fathers
All we know is how to double clutch revolvers
-Billy Danze (of MOP)

we seem so free in throwing around the words at-risk and high-risk to describe our city youth. at times, it can be maddening when you come to the realization that many things - no matter how hard you work or pray - are simply out of your hands. it can be frustrating. downright depressing. but you can never give up. that only begets a cycle of endless apathy.

so as i literally criss-crossed the city today, i had the chance to interact with a wide array of people. i should write a book about all of the disparate character studies that can found in a daily sweep.

we throw out suggestions and gripes and complaints, but offers solutions far and few between.

we rally for business and economic development, but don't really lend much credibility to entrepreneurial cultivation.

and some people talk without thinking. methinks that is a cardinal sin all by itself.

and boston city concilor jerry mcdermott is a d!ckhead. quote me, homie. he showed his a$$ yesterday. mad youth rolled through the city council's chambers because they were to vote on the new budget. everybody got up and gave their little monologues. but apparently, after too much talking, heads started getting antsy. but then mcdermott started puffing his chest out. so, like a wave, cats started standing up and turning turning their backs to the center (mainly because of mcdermott's comments). very dramatic from what i heard. you can peep the entire meeting online. scroll to the 2-hour mark to listen and see for yourself. i only heard consalvo and mike ross speak. i left right after ross played himself by speaking in favor of the budget. let's see how accurately horace's prediction will play out with that one. so anyways, after it got a little rowdy, they called in the blue boys and escorted much of the people out of the chambers. just unfortunate how flaherty got all shook up. hey, what can ya expect from city government. democracy at its finest, right?

we clamor for safer streets, yet don't truly put the effort in to make them safer.

a year ago today, one of the youth from Project Hip-Hop lost his life at the hands of an unknown assailant.

i had just met son a few days prior when PHH had its summer retreat for youth who were going to be participating in the summer program.

this afternoon, this year's teens will venture out to the burbs for the same retreat. it's a way for them to bond, and gain new insight on being young leaders and activists, etc.

he was supposed to roll out a few days later with the group on a road trip across several states to get out of Boston and see some new sights and have some new experiences.

but obviously, that was not so.

though i only had a brief encounter with him, it is still very fresh in my mind.

i often think back to when i was 17.

the run-ins i had were obvioulsy not that bad since i'm still here to write about them. but yet, i cannot help but rationalize about the state of my peoples. not our people. my peoples.

matter of fact. last evening, i found myself unexpectedly roaming some roxbury blocks because of rumors of some drama popping off with youth from another hood.

it can be frustrating. nauseating. overwhelming. how do you balance that line of doing something with not overdoing it. well maybe overdo it is not the right word. but i haven't had the best way with words lately. so let's just say progress is only as evident as your perception of the initial problem. i met two mothers last night of teenage boys. you could see the anxiety in their faces. your could feel the vulnerability in their hugs and handshakes.

until shT truly hits home do you realize the importance of something that was previously insignificant or even irrelevant. but now it's an issue. now, it's a priority.

so although he didn't make it onto our to-do list, please do what you can.

rest in peace, kareem. your spirit lives on along with all of the other youth we've lost to the evils of the streets.