you do us a disservice when you become sheep

So said my mellow my man, Sirius Black. Truer words ain't never been spoken.

I had what may go down as one of the most professionally challenging dilemmas I have ever encountered.

I was out around the way for most of the day. My morning stop at a middle school entailed some real productivity. I managed to resolve some of the principal's technology issues on-site. I got clarification and a plan of action for some small tech projects we have in progress at the school. I checked in on a teacher who I assisted my prior visit and she gave me the thumbs up. I assisted another teacher with some robotics kits and curriculum and answered some questions to help her get an after-school program off the ground.

And then it happened.

These two kids were hemming each other up on the hallway. And when I say hemming I mean straight YOKE CITY up in this piece. Now, about 30 minutes earlier or so as I was waiting for the teacher to finish class, I did casually notice a couple of hallway straggler but thought nothing of it. I also threw in my own little, 'yo watch your mouth' when one kid was bumping his gums a little too loosely. So anyways, back to this little scuffle in the hall. Now, mind you, our arms are full with the kits from the trunk of my car. To my right is this big black dude; literally. He stood about 6 feet solid and was a good 250. That's my word. And he was motionless. And I was dumbstruck.

The kids eventually fell back and chilled after we walked by and resumed our work. Some of the other kids follow us to the room asking what the kits were for. So me being me, I just start rapping with them.

And then it happened again.

This one kid feeds off my questions and blankly states, 'i don't go to class.' I kinda ignore him and then pounce on him with more questions. I took the career approach on what he'd like to be in life and he literally made my soul cry. He was obviously very bright, but I could smell the bullshT on the tip of his lips. He gave me some very straight-up answers and I came right back with my matter-of-fact jawns. Then he gave me the 'you're entitled to your opinion and I'm entitled to mine' line and kinda dismissed me. I couldn't decide between punching him in his fuqing nose or hugging him. It was the most unnerving situation I have encountered in a long time. And rarely get uncomfortable because I do not like it one bit. Yet, I had to keep trying. Turns out, he wants to be a mechanic, yet admits that everyone then tells him you still need school for that, to which he shrugs it off. So I even resort to some last-minute reverse psychology shT and tell him to ask the questions because he seems to already know all the answers to get his shT together. He fell for it for a full 10 seconds; tops. So then I drop the disservice/sheep line on him that the homie Sirius Black dropped last night at Poetic Escape. He soaks it in and I ride out letting him know how to reach me when he's ready.

And then I see the big black dude. And for a good five minutes I am torn between calling him out for just standing there earlier or just letting it ride. So I do a little investigative work and decide to say something. I tap on the door and we speak for about 10 minutes. And I get the full story. I've never truly understood what 'lab cluster' means, but now I know. And he opened up to new perspectives on how such issues can and should be addressed. I won't say I agree with everything he said, but he did make valid points. Do you really want to break up a fight every 30 minutes? When it's the same kids fighting one day and sitting next to each other in class joking 30 minutes later? When you're not even supposed to truly jump in the foray? When there are past examples of teaching getting injured? When there is a lack of ground rules and non-negotiables? Even when a big black dude - a potential role model to these young black boys teeter-tottering on the each of manhood - is virtually helpless amidst of an environment where it literally seems like a pre-prison summer camp?

I often say, you learn something every day. And I love the feeling. I bask in the glow of those light bulbs that go off in my head when something new makes something old click. Today was a learning experience that I'm going to have to let marinate and digest for a hot minute. Because right now, I've got indigestion like a mutha....